Do you Ever Feel like...

Do you ever feel like what God has asked of you is just too big?



Here, let's downsize a little... Do you ever feel like your specific calling as a Christian, an ambassador for Christ in this world, is a little on the "ya I'd dream to do that, but I don't really expect it to ever come true" side?



I've been thinking about it lately... After years of praying and forgetting to pray for "career guidance" from God, He pretty blatantly told me over the span of a week this last semester in college that I was supposed to be a missionary... not just that, but a missionary to unreached peoples... not just that, but also in a psychologist/ counselor capacity.



Pretty intense right? I mean... we always pray that God would just be straightforward, that we would "hear His voice" more clearly, and we've grown to desire nothing but a straight and quick answer. Now, mind you, this answer has been three or four years of patience in the making, but He sure hit me smack dab between the eyes with this one.



Don't get me wrong, praise God that He saw fit to put a calling so strongly on my life that even I can't deny or shrink back from it when I feel just "too tired" or worn out to think about the long term and where all of this is going...



The fact is, though, that I often get the feeling that this is all too big... I mean, "Sure God, you've asked me to be a missionary, to share your hope, your reconciliation, your peace, your abiding love with the people of [country yet to be clarified when the time comes], but... I mean... are you sure?"...



And then the thoughts and the conversation trails off into a list as long as a roll of toilet paper running, hopping, bouncing, unravelling down a spiral staircase... just continually revealing the doubt after limitation after weakness that's within me.



But then I really think about it...



We all have limitless limitations, faults, doubts, and power issues in our lives.




None of us are capable of taking the gospel to a people and making them believe without God's help.



None of us are perfectly equipped for anything we are asked to do in this life...



I mean, look at David... he was asked by God to slay a giant... with a slingshot... I'd say he was pretty limited and poorly equipped for that feat, and yet God used that little boy to accomplish it!




Isn't that what it's all about? How could we ever learn anything if it weren't so?! It's in the testing of our limitations, the disciplining and "beating" of our bodies, as Paul puts it, that we become anything.


And even then... we aren't anything without the God who saved us.



This world, this plan, this thing that we call a Call may seem way too big for me, and that may daunt me at times, but that's the point. If I could do it all, there would be no power in it, because my power is nothing, and it won't impact a thing... but what God has been teaching me this past year is that at my weakest point, His power is at it's greatest, and it's those moments in which we can learn the most and make the biggest impact for God.